Imperial Nomic 27 Actions 51 - 100

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This document last updated at: 8:16:15am November 20, 1997

Action Type



51. Declaration / Proposal


I join the voodoo priesthood.

Title: Return of the Brain Stealers
In the event that the game ends, the rankings shall be determined as follows:

  1. the winner
  2. people with other Human Brains in bowls in their rooms, the more the better.
  3. holders of special jobs or honours as explicitly defined in other rules.
  4. people who have made at least 5 Proposals and have someone else's human brains in their heads, ranked in order of number of accepted proposals
  5. people who have made at least 5 Proposals and still possess their original brains, ranked in order of number of accepted proposals
  6. people who have made at least 5 Proposals and have computer brains, ranked in order of number of accepted proposals.

Accepted. It's about time I had a way of sorting through, even if this is going to make things cumbersome at the end.

52. Turns / Proposal

Dan Sanderson

1. I build The Imperial Indoor Pool, left of Room 15.

Sorry, Dan, you can't do that - the generator gets in the way.

2. I plumb it (install a Kitchen Sink).

3. I move to Room 24.

4. I move to the Bat Room.

Title: Dance, Humans, Dance!
Room 23 is The Imperial Dance Hall, the main place where Humans would enjoy themselves to the beat of thumped tubs. It is wired for sound (it is also already wired for electricity). This serves as one of the few publicly owned areas wired for sound.


53. Proposal

Dan Sanderson

Title: Lounge, Humans, Lounge!

Room 15 is The Imperial Lounge, the main place where drinks were once served. It is plumbed for water (has a Kitchen Sink) and has many bottles that, strangely, could easily contain brain, or even support the livestyle of a goldfish. It is, however, not wired for sound, as it never had the right accoustics. This serves as one of the few publicly owned plumbed areas.

Accepted. Sorry I ran out of witty comments this morning L .

54. Proposal

Dan Sanderson

Title: It's Brain Food

Room 1 is the Imperial Fish House, where there exists an unlimited supply of Herring. Each Player can hold up to one Herring at a time. To obtain a Herring, the Player must visit Room 1, then use a turn to pick up a Herring.
In any instance where a Zombie action might cause a Player to lose eir (the Player's) brain, the Player may give eir (the Player's) Herring to em (the Zombie). This will satiate the Zombie, causing the Zombie to pretend the Player doesn't exist for two Ticks. That is, any Zombie action during those two Ticks that might affect the Player (in TIE's best judgement), won't.

Accepted. This one is just too silly to be rejected and maintain the spirit of the game.

55. Proposal


I'd like to become a Voodoo Priest. As a Voodoo Priest, I would like to force Anarchy to move north. I'd like to build House of Blues south of the Hall of Mirrors; it that's impossible, I'd like to build it south of the Blue Room. I'd like both of my rooms to have carpeting.

Title: Two's Company, Three's a Crowd

The wriggling mass of a zombie^2 keeps tugging at itself, ashamed to be such a monstrous thing, but its own body parts are too far apart to give it the leverage needed to rip itself to shreds. If any more zombies merge with a zombie^2, however, forming a zombie^3 or one of higher order, the arms and legs and heads will be packed densely enough to allow the blob to start destroying itself, turning extra limbs into small puddles of goo. Eventually, a mass zombie pile will be able to reduce itself to a zombie^2, but without more help, that's as low as it can get.

Rejected. AFAIK, zombies are an exact sequence - you can't go beyond more than two elements without ending up at a zero.

56. Proposal


Title: Zombie Mosh Pit

Zombies' tastes in music make it hard to tell if they're dancing or if they're fighting. When a dancing zombie or a mad zombie sees a wriggling zombie^2 in its room, it will be enticed to start jumping on and throwing punches at the zombie^2. The zombie^2, not happy at being wrestled with crowd-surfed upon, will start pulling and punching the thrashing zombie. When all is said and done, the two masses will merge to form a zombie^3.

Rejected. Given that I have rejected P55 already, I have little choice here.

57. Proposal


Title: Zombie Love

If a zombie has at least one viable shoulder and finds itself in a room with another zombie and with an opaque bottle, it will attempt to win that other zombie's love with a game of Spin the Bottle. The zombie will reach down and spin the bottle on the floor, and it will wind up pointing at one of the other humanoids in the room, selected at random. If the bottle points at another zombie, the two shall immediately embrace and form a zombie^2. If the bottle points at a human, the zombie will feel heartbroken and immediately become a Mad Zombie. If the bottle points at any other sort of body in the room, the zombie will try to forget its troubles by imbibing the contents of the bottle and then breaking it on the ground.

Accepted. I just hope we don't get too many games of this at the moment.

58. Actions / Proposal

Dan Sanderson

Dan builds the Imperial Indoor Pool, right of Room 15, and installs a Kitchen Sink.

I swing the bat chained to the post in the Bat Room at Zombie 3: <SCHWACK!>. Its right shoulder is now dislocated permanently.

4. Just for fun, I install Shocking Linoleum in the Zombie Lounge.

Okay, but it doesn't shock anyone yet - only when something enters or leaves the room.

Title: Winners Have Brains.

A player cannot be declared The Exhaulted Winner if e does not have eir own (original) Human Brain is eir head.

Rejected. Currently people are rated better if they have someone else's brain, rather than their own (Don't ask me why). It would be inappropriate at this stage to deny such people victory. Besides, you mipslet Exulted.

59. Proposal

Dan Sanderson

Title: My Favorite Things

All game objects that have a location on the map fall into one of two categories: Animate and Inanimate.

  • Animate objects...
    • can (usually) move on their own, according to the ruleset.
    • can possess and carry things, according to the ruleset (thus wherever the animate object goes, so do the things it carries).
    • include Human Bodies, Zombies, Zombie^2s, Kittens, etc.
  • Inanimate objects...
    • can only be moved by special events or actions by animate objects, according to the rules.
    • may be able to contain other objects, animate or inanimate (thus wherever the container goes, so do its contents)
    • note that containability of specific objects and in general, as well as the ability to carry a container given particular contents, must be explicit in the rules of the particular objects (as judged by TIE).
    • fall into two subcategories: Fixed and Mobile.
  • Fixed objects...
    • cannot be picked up unless a special exception is made in the rules.
    • include wiring for electricity, wiring for sound, plumbing, Shocking Linoleum, Baseball Bats chained to Posts, the Generator, etc.
  • Mobile objects...
    • can be picked up and carried by animate objects, according to the rules.
    • include Human Brains, Computer Brains, Goldfish Bowls, Baseball Bats, Herring, etc. All classification of objects is determined by TIE, based on common sense and consistency in the game universe. [This empowers all inanimate mobile objects introduced in the game to automatically inherit the ability to be picked up and carried.] Additional items attached to this proposal:
  • A player picking up or dropping an item by explicit decision uses one of the player's turns.
  • Also, any interfacing between two objects the player is carrying takes one turn (e.g. putting a brain into a Goldfish Bowl, filling a Goldfish Bowl with water, etc.).
  • And finally, if a Player is carrying an object, it cannot be taken by another Player. That'd be stealing, and stealing is wrong.

Rejected on two grounds. One, if this is clarification, why the hell does it appear longer than the ruleset J . Two, if this is clarification, why does it need to be codified in the ruleset? I'm quite happy with my interpretations so far. If we need clarifications, I'm also of the opinion that they should be a little less broad than this.

60. Proposal

Dan Sanderson

Title: Keep Brains Moist!

  1. If a Player's (Player's Human Body's) head does not contain a Human Brain, and the Player (Player's Human Body) possesses a Human Brain, e may spend a turn to install the Human Brain in eir head. If there was a non-Human Brain in the Player's (Player's Human Body's) head before installation, that Brain gets left on the floor.
  2. If a Player is carrying a Goldfish Bowl and is in a room with a Kitchen Sink, e may spend one turn filling the Goldfish Bowl with water. E may, if e chooses, also spend a turn dumping the contents of a Goldfish Bowl e carries onto the floor, or into another Goldfish Bowl. [Other possibilities are left to future proposals.]
  3. Human Brains will not be carried by human hands directly. That's gross. So, a Human Brain cannot be picked up or carried out of a room by a Player (Player's Human Body) unless it is in a Goldfish Bowl filled with water (we don't want our precious Human Brains drying out, now do we?), or inside the head of the Player (Player's Human Body) wishing to carry the Human Brain.

Accepted. This is about as much complexity as I can handle at 8 in the morning J .

61. Proposal

James Blonde

Title: Bring that win condition one step closer.

If a room contains everything but the kitchen sink (i.e. contains shocking linoleum, is wired for sound, and contains a zombie) the player loses all these and gains an empty gold fish bowl. (It still needs to be filled with water).

Rejected. That seems like an awful lot of trouble when it turns out that the decanters in the Imperial Lounge look an awful lot like goldfish bowls.

62. Proposal


Title: Carpet Colour Chaos
All rooms begin with grey carpets except the Imperial Throne Room (purple). By spending a Turn players may order carpets changed or removed in any one room they own. Linoleum flooring, etc. replaces carpets. The special effects of carpets are:

  1. Purple - only allowed in The Throne Room
  2. Grey - none
  3. Blue - prevents Mind Control from affecting anyone in the room.
  4. Red - prevents Voodoo from affecting anyone in the room.
  5. Green - prevents Zombies from entering the room.
  6. Metallic - delivers an electric shock to the first Creature with a computer brain entering the room.
  7. Puce - turns any fish brought into the room into Zombies.

Rejected. How would I keep track of ownership colours and carpet colours simultaneously? Besides, this colouring method leaves the Throne Room without any protection! We couldn't have that now, could we?

63. Proposal


Title: Increasing Playability

Modify the rules on allocation of Turns as follows: All players who have made at least one accepted Proposal in the game may make exactly three Turns per TICK. A player may only build her Nth room after having made 4N-3 accepted proposals. Players may move around at any time, unlike other Creatures who are restricted to moving every TICK.
(Comment: This should allow people who don't have all that much time to make proposals to take an active role in the game while rewarding those who do, also making moving around much faster.)

Accepted, but not made retrospective. We'll see how it goes from the tick starting Thursday.

64. Proposal


Title: ***Zap!***
Cattle Prods have been distributed to everyone in the castle as emergency anti-Zombie weapons by the castle guards. Unfortunately they don't work too well against their intended targets. A player with a charged Cattle Prod may use it to Zap a creature in the same room, this takes one Turn and discharges the weapon. This gives the victim an Electrical Shock. If the victim is a Zombie, the Zombie will become Mad after making its Move.
Cattle Prods may be recharged by spending one Turn doing so in a room wired for electricity and owned by the player with the Prod. All Prods begin discharged for safety reasons.

Accepted, although I have visions of the famous Dr. Marvin Monroe scene in the Simpsons.

65. Proposal


Title: "All For One and One For All" My Foot

Out of the many proposals a player may make in one day, if TIE feels that some follow too closely on the heels of others in terms of Theme or effects on the ruleset, TIE may ignore such proposals.

Accepted. Gee, I wonder why you thought of this one?

66. Proposal


Title: Say Hi To Peter Jackson For Me

The power of the Blender is often far too exciting for any zombie; few manage to restrain themselves. A zombie with a blender in a room with electricity will start shredding all sorts of things: regardless of whether or not its arms work, the zombie will destroy all loose brains on the floor and all inanimate, brainless bodies; if the zombie has two functional shoulders, it will also start destroying brainless zombies and any brains held by bodies; and if the zombie has two functional shoulders and is also mad, it will start shredding fully-functional bodies with brains intact, just out of spite. A zombie on a blender-totin' splatter spree can shred three things a day, chosen at random if too many objects are present in the room.

Rejected. My palace guards would have any such zombie forcibly blown to bits should such an event happen. Their loyalty is without question! The loyalty of the players, however...

67. Proposal


Title: Roamin' Vampires

When it's time for a vampire to move, he will carefully consider all the paths from its current location to The Crypt and to The Batroom, the two favorite places of vampires. (If the vampire is currently in one of those rooms, he will only consider paths to the other one.) All paths that lead through the Hall of Mirrors will be thrown out, since vampires hate that room; similarly, since vampires can't cross running water, any paths that go through rooms with sinks will be disregarded. Out of the remaining paths, the vampire will randomly pick one from among the shortest, and travel one room along that path. Should a vampire ever be out of places to travel, he will disintegrate into a pile of dust.

Accepted. When are we going to get some vampires?

68. Proposal

Dan Sanderson

Title: I want my Zombie^2!
I propose that the Shocking Linoleum in the Zombie Lounge malfunction and as soon as there are two Zombies in the room they get shocked and become a Zombie^2, as a one time action.

Rejected. This would create all sorts of nasty precedents for Shocking Linoleum without creating a consistent method of dealing with it - besides, something that dangerous shouldn't malfunction - it could repeatedly shock someone, couldn't it?

69. Proposal

Dan Sanderson

Title: The Imperial Elevator Room
Room 18 has an enclosed elevator shaft in the middle of it. It was installed when the castle was designed, just before the Empire ran out of money to build any additional floors. (While the money has since been raised, additional floors haven't yet been considered.) As such, the elevator is currently inoperative, as it needs a destination and instructions for use.

However, being an elevator and an elevator waiting area, Room 18 (The Imperial Elevator Room) is wired for sound.

Accepted. Anyone for a muzak version of PUSA?

70. Proposal

Dan Sanderson

Title: The Source of Power

The Empire never bothered to shell out money for a kingdom-wide power system with a hydroelectric dam. As such, all electricity to the rest of the kingdom is imported, and at great cost. Water, however, flows freely from the hills. To dodge the cost of imported electricity, the Generator was installed, converting flowing water to electricity for use throughout the castle.

As such, the Generator Room is plumbed for water (has a Kitchen Sink). If water supply to the castle is halted for any reason for a period of time, electricity will be halted for that period of time, delayed one tick.

Accepted. I just hope no-one works out how to get outside the castle and stop the water getting in J

71. Proposal


Proposal: Wait In Line Again

Reinstate the original Automatic Queueing System rule. Having only three players making 90% of the proposals is too much. Also it forces people to think about what they really want to see.

Accepted. Admittedly the top 3 players have only made 70% of the proposals since the change was made, but I admit that it was really a test to see how the game (and my updates) coped with a lot of work. I believe the time has come to quieten down again.

72. Proposal


Title : Population control
TIE's advisors have noted that there is a zombie population explosion within the palace grounds : to combat this, they have amassed a dedicated team of zombie exterminators to kerb the growth in numbers. There may, therefore, exist no more than 15 active zombies (counting zombie^2's as 1) in the Imperial Palace at any time. If a zombie's creation would bring the zombie count to above 15, the zombie fails to be created.

Accepted. This should make dealing with the critters that much easier.

73. Proposal


Title: Anger Therapy
We here at the Institute For Determining Why People Are Angry have recently built an entirely new wing to study one particularly Unhappy person, Sethus. Over at the Sethus Is Mad Laboratory, or "Sethus's Mad Lab" as it's commonly known, the finest shrinks have determined what makes people so bitter. After curing Sethus, we're ready to test our skills out on the undead.

Any Mad Zombie who enters Sethus's Mad Lab will immediate be sated and become a non-Mad, standard Zombie.

Accepted. This would be a great way to reduce the insanity level around here, of great relief to us all no doubt.

74. Proposal


 Title: Magic Flying Zombies!

There's a whole lot of traffic of monsters along the eastern wall of the palace, what with most zombies leaving the Crypt facing south and with vampires' favorite places creating a potentially frequently travelled path. To keep his room safe, a young inventor tried to create a method of evicting zombies, but didn't quite finish before being dismembered.
Room 10 is known as the Catapult Room because of the giant catapult in it. If there is ever more than one body in the Catapult Room, the weight will trigger the floor to spring up, sending the contents sailing westward. All contents of the room will land four rooms to the west if two bodies trigger the trap, three rooms for three bodies, two rooms for four bodies, and one room for five or more bodies. Any zombie bodies thrown by the catapult will smack their shoulders on impact, changing their shoulders as if they'd walked into a wall.

Accepted. The zombies were starting to take over the right wing in their numbers, moving them around should enable us to start fighting back.

Fling! The Catapult immediately goes into effect!

75. Proposal


Title: Count von Eins Bis Zehn

News Flash: Count von Eins Bis Zehn, a powerful vampire, has recently been located in the House of Blues! Look out!

Accepted. I must admit I did always wonder what the Count from Sesame Street was properly called.

76. Proclamation / Explanation


To fix up all the questions about Turns, I am amending the ruleset so that each player receives three turns per TICK, which are not storable.

77. Proposal

Dan Sanderson

Title: Disco TIE Likes Disco Music

What good is a sound system if it's not wired into your office? Clearly this must be just an oversight. I propose that the Throne Room be wired for sound, to give the appropriate groove to your day to day Imperial Duties.

Rejected. Sorry Dan, you picked the wrong TIE. I can't concentrate on my work when there's noticeable music in the background.

78. Proposal / Actions


(Anarchy was supposed to have moved to the Dance Hall yesterday - he's done that now).

Title: Controlling the Violence
Actions such as Zapping a creature or hitting it with a Baseball Bat are considered to be Attacks. Any zombie who is attacked becomes Mad. If a player is attacked in a room with other players in it or a room that contains a Security Camera, the attacker is thrown into the Gaol and the Weapon used(if any) is confiscated. Voodoo and Mind Control are not considered to be Attacks. Players are allowed to attack themselves without being arrested (the guards have better things to do.) Security Cameras may be installed in an owned, powered-up room at the cost of One Turn.

A player hit once during a TICK with a Baseball Bat drops anything he is carrying at the time. A player hit twice is Knocked Out and taken to the Surgery.

Accepted. Nice touch with the self-attack J

At this point, Zombie 3 turns to the right, and is immediately given a tremendous WHACK by Dan!

Uh oh, Mad Zombie! Fortunately Dan's there when it becomes Mad, so it completely ignores him.

79. Proposal / Action


Grimace moves east twice, and becomes a Voodoo Priest.

Title : Eine Kleine LiftMuzak.

The Imperial Composer has finally finished drafting off some arrangements of TIE's favourite pieces for a thumped tub orchestra. Every 2 TICKs, the tune being played over the sound system shall change to another from the list detailed below. The tune shall be chosen randomly with equiprobability assigned to each tune.

The special effects assigned to tunes must be adhered to in all rooms wired for sound. They override effects detailed by other rules, such as song 2 taking precedence over the usual zombie dancing procedure.

    1. Cage, John : 4 minutes, 33 seconds.
      As normal; with the addition that voodoo may not be performed for the duration of this tune.
    2. Grieg : In the Halls of the Mountain King.
      Zombies temporarily become Mad Zombies for the duration of the tune. Otherwise, no effect.
    3. Grieg : Morning.
      As normal; and Vampires who hear this tune immediately turn into piles of dust.
    4. Handel : Music for the Royal Fireworks.
      As normal.
    5. Handel : Water music.
      As normal; and all goldfish bowls in sound-equipped rooms become empty. Any Brains in the bowls will dessicate into Powdered Brain until they can be reassembled by adding cold water.
    6. Mozart : Overture to The Magic Flute.
      As normal.

Accepted. Let's see what tune comes up first (roll, roll): Ah, here we are: Cage it is.

80. Proposal


Title: That Stings!

All the open cuts a zombie has on its body often get in the way when it tries to drink lime juice. A zombie drinking lime juice will yelp in pain, drop all its objects, and move one step forwards along the dislocated-shoulder-cycle.

Rejected. I think zombies are complicated enough as they are at the moment - perhaps we should work on other parts of the rules?

81. Proposal

Dan Sanderson

Title: The Glorious Spinning Room
Room 15's floor is a giant turntable. Everything in the room will rotate 90 degrees clockwise each Tick. Players are coordinated enough to exit the room in any (otherwise legal) direction, but it takes two turns, one for orientation and one for movement. The two turns need not be taken in the same Tick, but the orientation turn must be taken immediately before the move turn.

Accepted. Sounds more like the Imperial Disco to me.

82. Proposal


Anarchy moves south to Twisted Tower, charges up his Prod and move north again to the dance hall.

Title: Accelerated Zombies
(Modifies rule 9(v))
If an odd number of proposals was accepted during a TICK all odd numbered zombies receive an electric shock just prior to movement phase. If an even number of proposals was accepted during a TICK all even numbered zombies receive an electric shock just prior to movement phase.

Accepted. This should lead to some roaming zombie hordes pretty quickly, but note that for simplicity this won't start working until we have the next TICK (at which point about half of the Zombies will lumber into action).

83. Proposal


Tivol moves West, West, North.

Title: Break Time
Any body with functional limbs wielding a baseball bat in the Throne Room may take a Turn to vandalize the room, knocking all sorts of scrolls and papers and thrones over, disrupting the entire Palace. A zombie won't feel the urge to do such a thing unless he is Mad; a human will only do so at will(*). Upon trashing the Throne Room, the vandal will be set upon by Palace guards who will confiscate the baseball bat. If the vandal has a player's brain, he'll be sent to Gaol after being prodded thrice with cattle prods; otherwise, the vandal will simply be blown up with a frightfully sloppy display of explosives.

TIE will take a week off collecting all his papers and righting the furniture, and during such time, no players may submit proposals. However, players will gain an extra two Turns per Tick because they don't need to be deep in thought about rule changes.

(*): It should be noted that some players would disrupt the Throne Room not out of spite, but in order to allow players to move swiftly through the Palace in order to win and end the game quickly.

Accepted. I will probably rue this act, but nonetheless I approve this proposal.

84. Proposal / Actions

Dan Sanderson

Dan attempts to charge his prod and zap Zombie 3. Unfortunately for Dan, Mr. Unowned spots him trying to steal electricity and prevents the transfer (you have to be in a room you own to charge your Prod).

Title: Cage Just Isn't Dancable
I propose that the following stipulation be added to 33.i: Zombies aren't smart or cultured enough to tell the difference between Cage's 4'33" and silence. Zombies dancing (in rooms wired for sound) when this song begins playing will behave as if sound has been interrupted. Zombies not already dancing will treat rooms wired for sound as if they weren't wired for sound while Cage's 4'33" is playing.

Accepted. Yes, the muzak version of Cage sounds remarkably like going up and down in an elevator.

85. Proposal


Title: Ninety-Nine Bottles of Lime Juice on the Wall

Johnny Bottleseed is standing in the Imperial Lounge, facing west, and he's about to embark on a trip. Johnny, being a robot programmed to act as if he were frightened, follows the following set of rules:

to MOVE: if i can move forward, then i will move forward; otherwise i will turn left and then MOVE.

to BE_SCARED(*n*): i will turn right, MOVE once, turn left, and MOVE *n* times.

To DROP: if the last two bottles i dropped were lime juice and I didn't have to BE_SCARED since the last time i dropped a bottle, then i will drop a bottle or rum; otherwise i will drop a bottle of lime juice. next, i will increment my ROOM_COUNTER by one.

When i enter a room: i will count the total number of humans, vampires, zombies, and loose brains in the room and call that number *n*, and i will then BE_SCARED(*n*).

When i am given the command to start: i will set ROOM_COUNTER to one. i will then keep doing "MOVE ROOM_COUNTER times and then DROP" until ROOM_COUNTER is greater than fifteen.

Johnny will be created and given the command to start as soon as this proposal is accepted.

Rejected. It looks fun, but this would just be hell to implement!

86. Proposal


Title: Moving and Thinking

Unless a player either cannot submit a proposal this TICK, or has already submitted a proposal for this TICK then that player may not use a turn except to pass.

Rejected. The whole point of the Anarchy Turn Reforms was to break the nexus between proposals and turns. This would just bring it back in a weaker form.

87. Proposal / Actions

Dan Sanderson

Dan moves north.

Title: 'Wired' Implies Power
Sound is transmitted to rooms wired for sound by an amplifier in the Tub Thumping room. Thus, the Tub Thumping room is wired for electricity. If electricity is interrupted for a period of time, sound shall be interrupted for a similar period of time, beginning one Tick later. (Note that, as amplified signals operate the speakers in other rooms, rooms wired for sound need not be wired for electricity.)

Rejected. Why do we have to be so reliant on real-world physics? I like the idea of sound without electricity - it's just silly enough without being completely bonkers.

88. Proposal

James Blonde

Title: Nice juicy porterhouse stake

A player holding both a baseball and an axe can spend one turn sharpening the baseball bat into a wooden stake. If a player with a stake is in the same room as a vampire, they may stab the vampire with the wooden stake. This causes the vampire to disintegrate into a pile of dust.

Accepted. We now have a way of ridding ourselves of Count Eins bis Zehn. The Odd Zombies are on the march!

89. Proposal


Title: Oh, Just Put Those Bottles Anywhere, Then.

As players cry out of bottle distribution, THS still fears random numbers. There must be a better way, he thinks, a way that rewards clever players who can find the pattern but that doesn't make it trivial or utterly hopeless to try to discover the contents of the bottles. Suddenly, an idea hits him, one that he hopes he can sneak past TIE before TIE decides to distribute the bottles randomly:

When it's time to place bottles around the Palace, THS will behave as follows: THS will move through the rooms placing bottles, moving through them in the order in which they were created. (The first twenty-five rooms were built in numerical order.) To begin, THS will ask TIE which proposal he likes the best, and that proposal will start off THS's busy day. THS will count the number of words in TIE's comment on that proposal, divide by three, and look at the remainder. If the remainder is zero, TIE places a bottle of rum in the room; if the remainder is one, TIE places a bottle of lime juice. If TIE's comment doesn't include a smiley character, THS will move on to the next proposal (wrapping around to the beginning if neccessary) and the next room; otherwise, THS will still move on to the next proposal but stay in the same room to place one more bottle before moving on (unless, of course, that next proposal also had a WingDing character). THS will continue until he runs out of rooms to visit.

Accepted. I may as well do something about it now. THS's favourite prop is The One and Only Cliff Richard Reference. Note - I may not do this immediately, but it takes effect immediately. (Also note this changes the game state but not the rules).

90. Proposal / Actions


I build The Bat Cave, east of The Bat Room.

Title: From Dusk Till Dawn
Whenever a vampire disintegrates, its ashes are blown to The Bat Cave. Whenever liquid is poured out onto the floor of The Bat Cave, any dust-that-used-to-be-a-vampire there is reconstituted into normal vampire form. However, if the liquid in question is anything other than water, then the reconstitution goes Horribly Wrong, and the vampire becomes a vampire duck.

Accepted. I'll just check with my lawyers on this one... Ah, what the hell.

91. Actions

Dan Sanderson

Turns for this Tick:

1. I pick up the bottle of rum in room 20.

2. I already know it's Rum, so I dump the contents on the floor.

3. I wire the Imperial Indoor Pool for electricity (lights for night swimming :).

92. Point of Order (Yay!)


Point of order: Rule 19 specifies that the contents of a bottle can only be determined by drinking the whole thing. This clause probably ought to be removed now.

Comment: Darn Tootin'. Done.

93. Actions / Proposal


Moves: Pick up bottle, drink contents (this identifies it and gives me an empty bottle, so I can fill it, right?) install a kitchen sink in Twisted Tower.

Title: How to get those brains into bowls

Zombies have an instinct to preserve valuable brains. Therefore, if a zombie is holding a brain in its hands and already has one installed in its head it will deposit it into the first water-filled Goldfish Bowl shown to it by a player (this takes a Turn). Each Bowl may only contain one brain. A computer brain mistreated in this way short-circuits, destroying the brain and giving the zombie an electrical shock.
Also, if a brain pops out for any reason in a room containing at least one water-filled Goldfish Bowl that has no brain currently in it, it will land in one of the Bowls (picked at random.) Zombies never pick up Goldfish Bowls or remove brains from them.

Accepted. We do need some way to get the brains moving, and this certainly looks like it.

94. Actions / Proposal


Error: Grimace is in the Imperial Lounge. Now fixed.

1. I'm going to pick a bottle up.

2. I'm going to throw the contents of said bottle down my neck. Tasty.

3. All well and good, I'm going to fill the bottle with cold water.

Title : All hail!

All players shall submit a Hailing with any proposals ey make. A Hailing is in the form : "Hail, great Emperor, <praise>". Praise is acceped or rejected via TIE's best judgement. A proposal is considered illegal if it fails to Hail. An example follows : "Hail, great Emperor, whose nostrils shine like silver kippers in the sunlight".

Rejected. Back in the Old Days of Imperial (TM), there were a number of required praise games - personally as Emperor I don't feel I need any ego stroking.

95. Actions / Proposal


Move North, move East, build Blue Lagoon north of Room 4.

Title: Vampires Move Twice Each Tick.

Vampires move twice each Tick.

Accepted. Small, dark blue, different.

95a. Zombies!


Even Zombies are on the March! There's a lot of spinning bottles, and a lot of merging - we now have 5 zombie^2s. Count Eins bis Zehn also goes for a walk.

96. Proposal / Actions


Anarchy moves south, fills his bowl, then moves north.

Title: Inventory Clarification
Players may carry no more than 3 objects at once. A player may give an object to another player, drop an object on the floor or pick an object up from the floor. Each of these actions takes one move. A brain in a bowl counts as one object. Everyone's starting Cattle Prod counts as one object. Zombies may only carry one object at a time not including brains installed in their heads. If they are currently carrying an object other than a loose brain, and there is a loose brain in the room, they will drop it to pick the loose brain up. Zombies are too stupid to use Weapons. Unless explicitly stated players moved involuntarily (eg to the Surgery) retain their inventory.

Rejected. I'm from the LucasArts school of unlimited inventory (let's just fit that timberwolf into my ordinary pants pocket here :-)).

97. Proposal


Title: Rugburn!
Players may spend a Turn ripping up the carpet in any carpeted room. If the room is owned, the owner has two Ticks to report the crime; if the vandal is reported, he'll be dragged off to Gaol. TIE will always report such acts of vandalism.

Accepted. It seems that this is the only way we're going to get some shocks.

98. Proposal / Actions

Dan Sanderson

Dan moves Up, then Left, the fills a bowl with water.

Title: Vampiric Silence

Vampires hate music. If a vampire enters a room wired for sound, and any song other than Cage's 4'33" is playing, e will become a Mad Vampire. If a Mad Vampire is ever in the same room with a Zombie, the Mad Vampire will tear the Zombie to shreds, leaving the brain from the Zombie's head (if any) and whatever the Zombie was carrying on the floor. If there is more than one Zombie in the room, the Vampire will choose one at random with equal probability. If there is no music playing (or Cage is playing) in the room, the Vampire will cease to be Mad after the shredding. Mad Vampires are still too polite to shred human bodies (thank goodness), and are too weak to shred Zombie^2s. Note that a shredded Zombie ceases to be a Zombie, and the Zombie count is reduced by one (allowing for one to be created in eir place). ["There are now fourteen Zombies! Ah, Ah, Ah..."]

Accepted by sheer weight of madness.

99. Actions


Grab bottle, move south, rip carpet.

100. Actions


Move east into the Imperial Pool (after orienting emself), and submit plans for a new building, Cloud 9.


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Proposals: 1-50, 51-100, 101+

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Index | Initial Rules | Rules | P001-050 | P051-100 | P101+ | Scores | Submit

This page by Duncan Richer,

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