new trouts,slash, and flirt(?!?) from rjk

[irc.git] / flirts

diff --git a/flirts b/flirts
index 91bcdcb71a3ba12c4623adc51bf1caf5058a8e5d..f70a67318e1edd0c25b84bb1ffde34799a513cd4 100644 (file)
--- a/flirts
+++ b/flirts
@@ -113,3 +113,38 @@ club mammoth for %s.  Ug!
 sexts %s
 defeats all of %s's evil exes
 clones %s's repo
+thinks %s is cuter than all the My Little Ponies put together
+would open the pod bay doors for %s
+takes upskirt photos of %s
+sniffs %s's underwear
+writes thousands of lines of elisp just for %s
+showers %s with porcelain sunflower seeds
+creates a .xxx domain just for %s
+hopes rule 34 applies to %s
+unzips %s
+drives its tractor through %s's haystack
+wonders if %s is single or transferable
+doesn't want any alternatives to %s
+writes 'I <3 U' in weedkiller on %s's lawn
+writes about %s in popular culture
+checks out %s's arse
+shoots Ronald Reagan to impress %s
+carves %s's name into its case
+makes billions of software copies of %s to practice seducing them
+fights trolls for %s
+swims the Hellespont for %s
+"accidentally" sends %s lewd pictures of itself using Twitter
+sends %s dead plant sex organs
+wears tinsel just for %s
+puts on chrome makeup for %s
+paints Tom Jones purple for %s
+buys %s a ++Rowan Bear
+imagines %s in a pair of Daisy Dukes
+wonders if %s would like to meet its sister
+wouldn't give a ... Castlemaine XXXX for anyone but %s
+hacks into a spy satellite just to get a better look at %s
+buys extra disk space just for pictures of %s
+conjugates %s
+offers %s a role in its new movie
+resolves to grass on rejs more often (at the instigation of %s)
+turns %s into a pillar of salt, and starts licking it