sticks %s in a small room with Ian Paisley
rains she-trolls down upon %s
rains wheelbarrows on %s
-nominates %s for the UK Usenet Committee
hits %s with a replica of Milan cathedral
has %s transported to Botany Bay
petitions the PM to abolish %s
screams and leaps at %s
hits %s with a cockatrice corpse
sets %s up on a blind date with Jonathan Ross and Russell Brand
+gives %s a hard stare