proclaims "%s est omnis divisa in partes tres"
applies a spudger to %s
practices its McKayla Maroney impressions on %s
+declares %s to be the sort of nonsense up with which it will not put
+throws a fridge at %s
+buys a pair of glasses just so that it can glare at %s over the top of them
+strip-searches %s
+places a Pickelhaube on %s's chair
+presents %s with half a moose
+assaults %s with all of its trouts at once
+invites John Major to explain the Maastricht Treaty to %s
+pokes %s with a bayonet
+trains %s with an eel
+drinks %s's milkshake
+prints 32767 copies of the Windows Printer Test Page just for %s
+measures %s up for a casket
+appoints %s drummer for Spinal Tap
+will proclaim %s's faults
+inserts a cuddly trout into %s's pizza