new trout from rjk

[irc.git] / trouts

diff --git a/trouts b/trouts
index 32eb9e70d4a514706e8b9fe41cfb1e36e6ca0fd2..22cea9bc130fdd31303d24138909345f275e8c8a 100644 (file)
--- a/trouts
+++ b/trouts
@@ -207,7 +207,7 @@ supplements %s with a fish
 hits %s with an omega-3-supplemented fish finger
 blows a vuvuzela in %'s ear
 reads the Eye of Argon to %s
-traps %s in a lift with Steve Jobs
+traps %s in a lift with Alan Sugar
 pops a cap in %s's ass
 spies on %s through their webcam
 sets flying monkeys on %s
@@ -326,3 +326,38 @@ attempts to underestimate %s but fails
 circulates a pamphlet traducing %s
 fits up %s for the murder of someone photogenic
 scales %s down
+steals %s's immune system
+moves %s's home directory to a tmpfs
+uses %s as a scratch monkey
+denies %s three times
+casually pepper-sprays %s
+sticks an orange on %s's head
+sings the Free Software Song to %s
+immerses %s in Coca Cola
+presents %s with half a mouse
+blames %s for the latest trout
+arranges for %s to be devoured in the night by gerbils
+flattens %s
+bites %s
+nationalises %s
+renormalises %s
+accuses %s of witchcraft
+turns %s into a newt
+signs %s up for bulk fish delivery
+picks %s's low-hanging fruit
+installs Rick Santorum in %s's bedroom
+makes it known that the prime minister has "full confidence" in %s
+collides a large haddock with %s
+attacks %s with a banana
+scraps %s
+rackmounts %s
+assaults %s with Margaret Thatcher's handbag
+LARTs %s
+bustitutes %s
+downgrades %s's A-level results
+admires %s's valves
+forces %s to walk the plank
+maroons %s on a desert island with only eight records and a useless luxury object for company
+creates a black hole and pushes %s beyond the event horizon
+shoves a giant picture of Jimmy Wales in %s's face
+pays The Who to follow %s around