new flirts from rejs

[irc.git] / trouts

diff --git a/trouts b/trouts
index 2b14ef3c736252073ece4271b4fefbc187665bac..002717e4db78b54029656eeb3e02177e2f807ce5 100644 (file)
--- a/trouts
+++ b/trouts
@@ -429,7 +429,7 @@ thinks %s's village is missing its idiot
 court-martials %s
 suggests %s stick a pair of underpants on their head and pencils up their nose
 demands the source code to %s
-places four beetles in $s's bed
+places four beetles in %s's bed
 finds %s even less amusing than "your mum" jokes
 drags and drops %s
 sets the vermicious knids on %s
@@ -440,7 +440,6 @@ delivers seven thousand octopuses to %s
 removes all the buttons from %s's mouse
 moderates %s
 declares %s off-topic
-throws a custard pie at %s
 fills %s's bath with ducks
 parks across %s's driveway
 replaces %s with a 1GB shell script
@@ -609,7 +608,7 @@ causes %s's wardrobe to malfunction
 multiplies %s by zero
 divides %s by zero
 declares %s to be illegal, unworkable, and counter productive
-grudgingly conceeds that %s is not as bad as NFS
+grudgingly concedes that %s is not as bad as NFS
 causes "eaten by wolves" to appear on %s's screen
 makes kittens illegal just to annoy %s
 books the WBC to protest %s's funeral
@@ -634,3 +633,56 @@ decides %s deserves their own .fish domain
 shares its earworm with %s
 wishes %s would let it go
 demotes %s to Chief Whip
+accuses %s of handling salmon in suspicious circumstances
+throws shade at %s
+nominates %s for speedy deletion
+calls %s a monkey
+wishes %s would declare independence
+props %s up on bricks and steals all their wheels
+throws %s into an oubliette
+pushes %s out of a barnacle goose nest
+thinks there's something of the night about %s
+reckons %s couldn't outwit George W Bush
+gratuitously inserts punctuation into %s
+decorates %s with heavy-metal umlauts
+calls %s a pleb, then denies ever having done so
+changes %s's ringtone to "Agadoo"
+showers %s in unexpected raisins
+promises not to cancel cuts to the %s budget
+takes the sky from %s
+nerve-staples %s
+distims %s's doshes
+claims to be offended by %s and asks them to hide in a corner under a tablecloth
+trims %s
+sends %s an AOL CD
+crimps %s's bottom
+offers %s sartorial tips from Michael Portillo
+nominates %s for seedy depletion
+serves inferior fish to %s
+concretizes %s
+octofurcates %s
+thwaps %s with a SuperFish
+wheelclamps %s
+dumps a statue of Margaret Thatcher on %s's doorstep
+sends %s driving through Argentina in a car with an offensive numberplate
+changes %s's password to 'dQw4w9WgXcQ'
+marks %s "con sordino"
+goes to Buckingham Palace to request that %s be dissolved
+removes %s's head, shoulders, knees, and toes (knees and toes)
+kippers %s
+notes that %s almost makes XML look good
+breaks up %s's favourite band
+does that thing %s hates
+replaces %s with the phrase 'fart fart fart'
+outsources trouting %s to Capita
+laminates %s
+sends %s to trout camp
+thinks %s's website is best viewed in lynx
+migrates %s's broadband to TalkTalk
+blames %s for the next trout
+spaghettifies %s
+changes %s's phone number to an illegal prime number
+assaults %s with a double bass
+assaults %s with a single bass
+"peacefully liberates" %s
+shears %s