hits %s with a wet trout.
thwaps %s with a five-mile-long spacestation.
sacrifices %s to dark gods.
-bites his thumb at %s.
+bites its thumb at %s.
replaces %s with a 2-line shell script
takes off and nukes %s from orbit
treats %s with the contempt they deserve
wonders what God was thinking of when He made %s
removes %s from the gene pool
performs a lube-less rectal on %s
-uses %s to practice his orthopedic surgery on
+uses %s to practice its orthopedic surgery on
thinks %s would make excellent road-kill
plays basketball with %s's head
drops %s down a deep well
covers %s in blancmange
napalms %s
finds %s particularly irksome
-feeds %s to his pet dog
+feeds %s to its pet dog
reminds %s that life is not a game of Nethack
thinks that %s would give a cannibal nausea
wonders if %s is ever going to become a swan
applies TCP_CORK to %s
performs a capsaicin enema upon %s.
rejects %s in favour of the null hypothesis.
-had %s's mum. She cried out their name!
makes %s illegal.
compiles %s with -trigraphs
compiles %s with -Wtrigraphs
><> ><> %s
sets %s and robhu up on a blind date
gently taps %s with a menhir.
+invests all of %s's money in a high-grade structured credit strategy enhanced leverage fund.
+plays the viola at %s.
+thinks %s is comparable to iprocurement at its best
+defenestrates %s
+suggests %s re-installs Windows
+wonders if %s has tried turning it off and then back on again
+sticks %s's head in a pig
+dices %s and jumps up and down on the bits
+reboots %s to apply patches
+erects a Faraday cage around %s
+offers %s natto
+pops up and offers %s help with their Word documents
+rains herring on %s
+throws a bucket of sprats at %s
+hurls anchovies at %s
+covers %s in eels
+migrates all %s's email to Microsoft Exchange
+puts all %s's computers behind NAT