new trout from rjk

[irc.git] / trouts

diff --git a/trouts b/trouts
index 002717e4db78b54029656eeb3e02177e2f807ce5..50748facff3594d12efea2b69525a837ec612b5a 100644 (file)
--- a/trouts
+++ b/trouts
@@ -686,3 +686,19 @@ assaults %s with a double bass
 assaults %s with a single bass
 "peacefully liberates" %s
 shears %s
+attacks %s with a salmon cannon
+outsources %s's brain to #chiark
+apologizes for the inconvenience caused by %s
+operates a %s-free environment, for your comfort and convenience
+tars %s
+requires %s to submit all their requests for trouts through the service desk
+rot13s %s's wibbly bits
+rearranges all the cards in %s's wallet
+forces %s to revoke all their biometrics
+writes an essay entitled "%s Considered Harmful"
+gives %s a five-second head start then releases the hounds
+adds trouting %s to its service catalogue
+adds snitching on %s to its service catalogue
+follows %s around tolling a bell and crying 'Shame!'
+cancels %s's favorite show, 3/4 of the way through the second season
+hits %s so hard that LIGO notices