packs %s and %s off for a dirty weekend in Brighton
packs %s and %s off for a dirty weekend in Slough
pronounces %s and %s man and wife
-kidnaps a bishop and insists he marry %s and %s in absentia
+kidnaps a bishop and insists they marry %s and %s in absentia
puts %s and %s on adjacent rails
entangles %s and %s's wave functions
makes a nature documentary about %s and %s's mating habits
wonders whether %s and %s keep a dunking beaker beside the bed
invites %s and %s to a private IRC channel, and leaves them to it
blames %s and %s's relationship for the recent weather
+thinks %s and %s should protest against FIFA
+admires %s and %s's railcard photos
+divides %s by %s
+gives %s and %s a box of condoms and a knowing look
+snoops on %s and %s talking qwerty to each other
+makes a romcom about %s and %s
+installs a smart mattress in %s and %s's bedroom
+accuses %s of criminal conversation with %s
+resolves to grass on rejs more often (at the instigation of %s) (but %s is their secret admirer)