+applies TCP_CORK to %s
+performs a capsaicin enema upon %s.
+rejects %s in favour of the null hypothesis.
+makes %s illegal.
+compiles %s with -trigraphs
+compiles %s with -Wtrigraphs
+turns %s into dogfood
+><> ><> %s
+sets %s and robhu up on a blind date
+gently taps %s with a menhir.
+invests all of %s's money in a high-grade structured credit strategy enhanced leverage fund.
+plays the viola at %s.
+thinks %s is comparable to iprocurement at its best
+defenestrates %s
+suggests %s re-installs Windows
+winders if %s has tried turning it off and then back on again
+sticks %s's head in a pig
+dices %s and jumps up and down on the bits
+reboots %s to apply patches
+erects a Faraday cage around %s
+offers %s natto
+pops up and offers %s help with their Word documents
+rains herring on %s
+throws a bucket of sprats at %s
+hurls anchovies at %s
+covers %s in eels
+migrates all %s's email to Microsoft Exchange