Flirts and trouts from Ross Younger

diff --git a/flirts b/flirts
index 69b807a6d9fa1e6d93a38a41fca545db75ea59b7..75c60f9c0e62dbc1e35649decac997635ea87e7d 100644 (file)
--- a/flirts
+++ b/flirts
@@ -31,3 +31,18 @@ invites %s up for coffee
 promises %s a night to remember
 invites %s in to see its etchings
 wonders if %s is really that innocent
+serenades %s
+puts a rose between its teeth and tangoes seductively with %s
+plays with its hair whilst gazing at %s
+draws a magic circle around itself and %s
+tickles %s playfully
+draws a flattering portrait of %s
+poings happily at the sight of %s
+gives %s a high-five
+brushes lint off %s's clothing
+dims the lights for %s
+invites %s behind the bike sheds
+rides a tightrope on a unicycle while juggling chainsaws in an attempt to impress %s
+composes haiku for %s
+makes the tea for %s
+strokes %s's hair

diff --git a/trouts b/trouts
index a182ca242d97a9444bceca07a393d331a184475c..1246f925ba5924bb62750741f19aacfc1948013d 100644 (file)
--- a/trouts
+++ b/trouts
@@ -62,3 +62,22 @@ questions %s's lineage
 accuses %s of being a goth
 creeps up on %s wielding a crush emasculator
 watches %s splashing around in the shallow end of the gene pool
+swashbuckles the +2 Blessed Trout of Doom in %s's face
+runs over %s with a tank
+throws a rotten head of cabbage at %s
+flagellates %s with a birch branch
+sends %s to Coventry
+recoils from %s as if they have the plague
+kicks %s into touch
+teleports %s to the Dimension of Pain
+pours sour milk into %s's coffee
+drops a ferret into %s's clothing
+throws %s into the Cam
+tries to steal %s's dinner money
+attaches a debugger to %s
+introduces %s to the business end of half a wasp
+drives a manure spreader past %s
+goes flying with %s tied to a wing
+throws an explosive banana at %s
+subscribes %s to 1001 junk mail lists
+points at %s and laughs