The Tractor Factory Song ======================== Sung by The Comrade The Commune & The Comrades COMRADE: Once upon a time there was a valley, and in this valley there was a tractor factory COMRADES: What sort of tractor factory was it comrade? COMRADE: A glorious communist tractor factory! COMMUNE: YEAH! Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. COMRADE: And in this tractor factory there was a tractor COMRADES: What sort of tractor was it comrade? COMRADE: A wonderful shiny red tractor! COMMUNE: YEAH! And the tractor was in the tractor factory and the tractor factory was in the valley oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. COMRADE: And in this tractor there was an engine COMRADES: What sort of engine was it comrade? COMRADE: A great big socialist engine! COMMUNE: YEAH! And the engine was in the tractor and the tractor was in the tractor factory and the tractor factory was in the valley oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. COMRADE: And on this engine there was wheel COMRADES: What sort of wheel was it comrade? COMRADE: A marvellous round wheel! COMMUNE: YEAH! And the wheel was on the engine and the engine was in the tractor and the tractor was in the tractor factory and the tractor factory was in the valley oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. COMRADE: And on this wheel there was cog COMRADES: What sort of cog was it comrade? COMRADE: A brilliantly crafted cog! COMMUNE: YEAH! And the cog was on the wheel and the wheel was on the engine and the engine was in the tractor and the tractor was in the tractor factory and the tractor factory was in the valley oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. COMRADE: And on this cog there was a screw COMRADES: What sort of screw was it comrade? COMRADE: A twist tourney screw! COMMUNE: YEAH! And the screw was on the cog and the cog was on the wheel and the wheel was on the engine and the engine was in the tractor and the tractor was in the tractor factory and the tractor factory was in the valley oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. COMRADE: And on this screw there was some oil COMRADES: What sort of oil was it comrade? COMRADE: Some make the bits not rub together type oil! COMMUNE: YEAH! And the oil was on the screw and the screw was on the cog and the cog was on the wheel and the wheel was on the engine and the engine was in the tractor and the tractor was in the tractor factory and the tractor factory was in the valley oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. COMRADE: And on the oil there was a screwdriver COMRADES: What sort of screwdriver was it comrade? COMRADE: A help turn the screw type screwdriver COMMUNE: YEAH! And the screwdriver was on the oil and the oil was on the screw and the screw was on the cog and the cog was on the wheel and the wheel was on the engine and the engine was in the tractor and the tractor was in the tractor factory and the tractor factory was in the valley oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. COMRADE: And on the screwdriver there was a hand COMRADES: What sort of hand was it comrade? COMRADE: A having four fingers and a thumb type hand COMMUNE: YEAH! And the hand was on the screwdriver and the screwdriver was on the oil and the oil was on the screw and the screw was on the cog and the cog was on the wheel and the wheel was on the engine and the engine was in the tractor and the tractor was in the tractor factory and the tractor factory was in the valley oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. COMRADE: And on the hand there was an arm COMRADES: What sort of arm was it comrade? COMRADE: A connecting the hand to the rest of the body type arm COMMUNE: YEAH! And the arm was on the hand and the hand was on the screwdriver and the screwdriver was on the oil and the oil was on the screw and the screw was on the cog and the cog was on the wheel and the wheel was on the engine and the engine was in the tractor and the tractor was in the tractor factory and the tractor factory was in the valley oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. COMRADE: And on this arm there was a worker COMRADES: What sort of worker was it comrade? COMRADE: A glorious communist tractor factor worker COMMUNE: YEAH! And the worker was on the arm and the arm was on the hand and the hand was on the screwdriver and the screwdriver was on the oil and the oil was on the screw and the screw was on the cog and the cog was on the wheel and the wheel was on the engine and the engine was in the tractor and the tractor was in the tractor factory and the tractor factory was in the valley oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. COMRADE: And on this worker there was an overall COMRADES: What sort of overall was it comrade? COMRADE: A making sure the workers not naked type overall COMMUNE: YEAH! And the overall was on the worker and the worker was on the arm and the arm was on the hand and the hand was on the screwdriver and the screwdriver was on the oil and the oil was on the screw and the screw was on the cog and the cog was on the wheel and the wheel was on the engine and the engine was in the tractor and the tractor was in the tractor factory and the tractor factory was in the valley oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. COMRADE: And on this worker there was a pocket cOMRADES: What sort of pocket was it comrade? COMRADE: A keeping things in a handy place type pocket COMMUNE: YEAH! And the pocket was on the overall and the over all was on the worker and the worker was on the arm and the arm was on the hand and the hand was on the screwdriver and the screwdriver was on the oil and the oil was on the screw and the screw was on the cog and the cog was on the wheel and the wheel was on the engine and the engine was in the tractor and the tractor was in the tractor factory and the tractor factory was in the valley oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. COMRADE: And in this pocket there was a quota COMRADES: What sort of quota was it comrade? COMRADE: A wonderful five year plan type quota COMMUNE: YEAH! And the quota was in the pocket and the pocket was on the overall and the over all was on the worker and the worker was on the arm and the arm was on the hand and the hand was on the screwdriver and the screwdriver was on the oil and the oil was on the screw and the screw was on the cog and the cog was on the wheel and the wheel was on the engine and the engine was in the tractor and the tractor was in the tractor factory and the tractor factory was in the valley oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. cOMRADE: And by this quota there was a wall COMRADES: What sort of wall was it comrade? COMRADE: A tractor factory type wall COMMUNE: YEAH! And the wall was by the quota and the quota was in the pocket and the pocket was on the overall and the over all was on the worker and the worker was on the arm and the arm was on the hand and the hand was on the screwdriver and the screwdriver was on the oil and the oil was on the screw and the screw was on the cog and the cog was on the wheel and the wheel was on the engine and the engine was in the tractor and the tractor was in the tractor factory and the tractor factory was in the valley oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. COMRADE: And in this wall there was a window COMRADES: What sort of window was it comrade? COMRADE: A looking through so you can see the outside type window COMMUNE: YEAH! And the window was in the wall and the wall was by the quota and the quota was in the pocket and the pocket was on the overall and the over all was on the worker and the worker was on the arm and the arm was on the hand and the hand was on the screwdriver and the screwdriver was on the oil and the oil was on the screw and the screw was on the cog and the cog was on the wheel and the wheel was on the engine and the engine was in the tractor and the tractor was in the tractor factory and the tractor factory was in the valley oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. COMRADE: And through this window there was a field COMRADES: What sort of field was it comrade? COMRADE: An agricultural wonders of the communist state type field COMMUNE: YEAH! And the field was through the window and the window was in the wall and the wall was by the quota and the quota was in the pocket and the pocket was on the overall and the over all was on the worker and the worker was on the arm and the arm was on the hand and the hand was on the screwdriver and the screwdriver was on the oil and the oil was on the screw and the screw was on the cog and the cog was on the wheel and the wheel was on the engine and the engine was in the tractor and the tractor was in the tractor factory and the tractor factory was in the valley oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. COMRADE: And in this field there was a potato COMRADES: What sort of potato was it comrade? COMRADE: A glorious communist type potato COMMUNE: YEAH! And the potato was in the field and the field was through the window and the window was in the wall and the wall was by the quota and the quota was in the pocket and the pocket was on the overall and the over all was on the worker and the worker was on the arm and the arm was on the hand and the hand was on the screwdriver and the screwdriver was on the oil and the oil was on the screw and the screw was on the cog and the cog was on the wheel and the wheel was on the engine and the engine was in the tractor and the tractor was in the tractor factory and the tractor factory was in the valley oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. COMRADE: And next to this potato there was a potato COMRADES: What sort of potato was it comrade? COMRADE: A keeping the peasants feed type potato COMMUNE: YEAH! And the potato was by the potato and the potato was in the field and the field was through the window and the window was in the wall and the wall was by the quota and the quota was in the pocket and the pocket was on the overall and the over all was on the worker and the worker was on the arm and the arm was on the hand and the hand was on the screwdriver and the screwdriver was on the oil and the oil was on the screw and the screw was on the cog and the cog was on the wheel and the wheel was on the engine and the engine was in the tractor and the tractor was in the tractor factory and the tractor factory was in the valley oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. COMRADE: And next to this potato there was another potato COMRADES: What sort of potato was it comrade? COMRADE: A showing the power of a controlled farming system type potato COMMUNE: YEAH! And the potato was by the potato and the potato was by the potato and the potato was in the field and the field was through the window and the window was in the wall and the wall was by the quota and the quota was in the pocket and the pocket was on the overall and the over all was on the worker and the worker was on the arm and the arm was on the hand and the hand was on the screwdriver and the screwdriver was on the oil and the oil was on the screw and the screw was on the cog and the cog was on the wheel and the wheel was on the engine and the engine was in the tractor and the tractor was in the tractor factory and the tractor factory was in the valley oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. COMRADE: And next to this potato there was yet another potato COMRADES: What sort of potato was it comrade? COMRADE: A look at all the potatos we have type potato COMMUNE: YEAH! And the potato was by the potato and the potato was by the potato and the potato was by the potato and the potato was in the field and the field was through the window and the window was in the wall and the wall was by the quota and the quota was in the pocket and the pocket was on the overall and the over all was on the worker and the worker was on the arm and the arm was on the hand and the hand was on the screwdriver and the screwdriver was on the oil and the oil was on the screw and the screw was on the cog and the cog was on the wheel and the wheel was on the engine and the engine was in the tractor and the tractor was in the tractor factory and the tractor factory was in the valley oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. COMRADE: And next to this potato there was yet another potato COMRADES: What sort of potato was it comrade? COMRADE: A lets make vodka with all the spare potatos type potato COMMUNE: YEAH! And the potato was by the potato And the potato was by the potato and the potato was by the potato and the potato was by the potato and the potato was in the field and the field was through the window and the window was in the wall and the wall was by the quota and the quota was in the pocket and the pocket was on the overall and the overall was on the worker and the worker was on the arm and the arm was on the hand and the hand was on the screwdriver and the screwdriver was on the oil and the oil was on the screw and the screw was on the cog and the cog was on the wheel and the wheel was on the engine and the engine was in the tractor and the tractor was in the tractor factory and the tractor factory was in the valley oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh oh Hey ho the tractor factory, the one down in the valley oh. Carry on until killed or drunk or bored… The Comrade is the person leading the song, the comrades is everyone else and the commune is both the comrade and comrades. If you’ve heard a different version then that’s cause it’s normally made up as you go along so you can’t really get it wrong unless you don’t have fun and make lots of noise (tune is optional). The record for potato’s is about thirty before death or passing out due to alcohol poisoning Oh and remember to use exceptionally thick pseudo Russian accents… Enjoy Andy Davies