X-Git-Url: http://www.chiark.greenend.org.uk/ucgi/~matthewv/git?p=irc.git;a=blobdiff_plain;f=trouts;h=397494a16b42890f87790f97d9532d89bd19fc5e;hp=4e4467d2ca406a6b386c2e7455b2088373f094bd;hb=76b48de32125340f587ad494363fc2aaec6d4d1f;hpb=768e19abc0708582c6a3459b39125cc42170f9a1

diff --git a/trouts b/trouts
index 4e4467d..397494a 100644
--- a/trouts
+++ b/trouts
@@ -95,7 +95,6 @@ throws a cat at %s
 kidnaps %s and fills their shoes with custard
 plays Britney Spears songs at %s
 fills %s's ears with butter
-inverts %s
 throws %s to the lions
 sacrifices %s for the greater good
 patents %s's genome
@@ -152,7 +151,6 @@ compiles %s with -trigraphs
 compiles %s with -Wtrigraphs
 turns %s into dogfood
 ><> ><> %s
-sets %s and robhu up on a blind date
 gently taps %s with a menhir
 invests all of %s's money in a high-grade structured credit strategy enhanced leverage fund
 plays the viola at %s
@@ -174,3 +172,87 @@ migrates all %s's email to Microsoft Exchange
 puts all %s's computers behind NAT
 punches %s
 affixes live crocodiles to %s
+tortures %s with the collected bad puns of #chiark
+signs %s up for the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation choir
+deports %s
+thinks %s is even less relevant than Nick Clegg
+forces %s to listen to David Cameron's speeches
+sticks %s in a small room with Ian Paisley
+rains she-trolls down upon %s
+rains wheelbarrows on %s
+hits %s with a replica of Milan cathedral
+has %s transported to Botany Bay
+petitions the PM to abolish %s
+sneezes all over %s
+speculatively executes %s
+screams and leaps at %s
+hits %s with a cockatrice corpse
+sets %s up on a blind date with Jonathan Ross and Russell Brand
+gives %s a hard stare
+neuralyzes %s
+press-gangs %s
+feeds %s fugu kimo
+sends %s on an adventure holiday organised by Weyland-Yutani
+thous %s
+puts potato eyes down %s's shirt
+invites the Shame Orb to %s's party
+recommends the closure of airspace downwind of %s
+flies %s through a cloud of volcanic ash
+buggers a weasel with %s
+posts %s a bobcat
+disestablishes %s
+sets %s on fire
+creates an "I hate %s" group on Facebook
+supplements %s with a fish
+hits %s with an omega-3-supplemented fish finger
+blows a vuvuzela in %'s ear
+reads the Eye of Argon to %s
+traps %s in a lift with Steve Jobs
+pops a cap in %s's ass
+spies on %s through their webcam
+sets flying monkeys on %s
+drop-kicks %s through the goalposts of life
+throws %s's eye across a crowded room
+proves %s equivalent to the halting problem
+writes '%s' on an ostrakon
+synchronizes %s with /dev/null
+pushes %s into a ditch
+expunges %s
+exiles %s to Siberia
+replaces %s's internet with a 1200 baud modem
+triggers %s's halt and catch fire instruction
+covers %s in toothpaste
+covers %s in Marmite and waits for the lawyers
+punctures %s's balloon
+sends %s a copy of Julian Assange's hair styling tips
+makes a two-fingered gesture at %s
+downgrades %s
+shops %s to the Coalition For Neural Purity
+cleans the toilets with %s
+slurps %s's brains out through their nose
+glues %s's ears together
+nails %s's beak to the bar
+puts lizards in %s's bed
+rebases %s
+sends %s a red nose
+hides a porcupine in %s's bed
+forces %s to listen to Gaddafi's greatest speeches
+feeds %s drugs and waits for the Revolution
+inserts a lemon into %s
+irradiates %s
+exposes %s to ebola
+hollows out %s
+translates all %s's code into BOURNEGOL
+encrypts %s and throws away the key
+posts %s half a giraffe
+buries %s in elephant dung
+'accidentally' steps on %s's toes
+puts laxatives in %s's chocolate
+books %s on a holiday in Fukushima
+rmgroups %s
+compresses %s
+stamps on all %s's toys
+sends %s's phone number to twenty double glazing salespeople
+immerses %s's genitals in boiling oil
+writes 'I <3 U' in weedkiller on %s's lawn
+treats %s to 30,000 words on blancmange in popular culture