X-Git-Url: http://www.chiark.greenend.org.uk/ucgi/~matthewv/git?p=irc.git;a=blobdiff_plain;f=trouts;h=1b710f0fdc8dda09f59fb5409d2d383f46a94fda;hp=dc61771e0cb4062ff1b33ac8688f42f41ca90e3c;hb=e78f0f3012bf5bc3a2aeca2cb1b899daa6bfacff;hpb=d116e536819004896f3a98f41d8e33c92b34500b diff --git a/trouts b/trouts index dc61771..1b710f0 100644 --- a/trouts +++ b/trouts @@ -95,7 +95,6 @@ throws a cat at %s kidnaps %s and fills their shoes with custard plays Britney Spears songs at %s fills %s's ears with butter -inverts %s throws %s to the lions sacrifices %s for the greater good patents %s's genome @@ -189,3 +188,77 @@ speculatively executes %s screams and leaps at %s hits %s with a cockatrice corpse sets %s up on a blind date with Jonathan Ross and Russell Brand +gives %s a hard stare +neuralyzes %s +press-gangs %s +feeds %s fugu kimo +sends %s on an adventure holiday organised by Weyland-Yutani +thous %s +puts potato eyes down %s's shirt +invites the Shame Orb to %s's party +recommends the closure of airspace downwind of %s +flies %s through a cloud of volcanic ash +buggers a weasel with %s +posts %s a bobcat +disestablishes %s +sets %s on fire +creates an "I hate %s" group on Facebook +supplements %s with a fish +hits %s with an omega-3-supplemented fish finger +blows a vuvuzela in %'s ear +reads the Eye of Argon to %s +traps %s in a lift with Steve Jobs +pops a cap in %s's ass +spies on %s through their webcam +sets flying monkeys on %s +drop-kicks %s through the goalposts of life +throws %s's eye across a crowded room +proves %s equivalent to the halting problem +writes '%s' on an ostrakon +synchronizes %s with /dev/null +pushes %s into a ditch +expunges %s +exiles %s to Siberia +replaces %s's internet with a 1200 baud modem +triggers %s's halt and catch fire instruction +covers %s in toothpaste +covers %s in Marmite and waits for the lawyers +punctures %s's balloon +sends %s a copy of Julian Assange's hair styling tips +makes a two-fingered gesture at %s +downgrades %s +shops %s to the Coalition For Neural Purity +cleans the toilets with %s +slurps %s's brains out through their nose +glues %s's ears together +nails %s's beak to the bar +puts lizards in %s's bed +rebases %s +sends %s a red nose +hides a porcupine in %s's bed +forces %s to listen to Gaddafi's greatest speeches +feeds %s drugs and waits for the Revolution +inserts a lemon into %s +irradiates %s +exposes %s to ebola +hollows out %s +translates all %s's code into BOURNEGOL +encrypts %s and throws away the key +posts %s half a giraffe +buries %s in elephant dung +'accidentally' steps on %s's toes +puts laxatives in %s's chocolate +books %s on a holiday in Fukushima +rmgroups %s +compresses %s +stamps on all %s's toys +sends %s's phone number to twenty double glazing salespeople +immerses %s's genitals in boiling oil +writes 'I <3 U' in weedkiller on %s's lawn +treats %s to 30,000 words on blancmange in popular culture +vandalises %s's wikipedia entry +adds #! /usr/bin/perl to the top of %s's python scripts +pen-tests %s +steals %s's vital bodily fluids +hides a bomb in %s's cornflakes +replaces %s's files with zalgo