X-Git-Url: http://www.chiark.greenend.org.uk/ucgi/~matthewv/git?p=irc.git;a=blobdiff_plain;f=trouts;h=01cb60c18cc08c0405603edace940c75ec7442b6;hp=8adc9bb08d387f3129806e7c5b3fbf460b93fae8;hb=cedfe635214abf9ec47a90a1a12e942f43d24adf;hpb=bf078563c88b2f50c008ca296413823d409b7474

diff --git a/trouts b/trouts
index 8adc9bb..01cb60c 100644
--- a/trouts
+++ b/trouts
@@ -424,7 +424,6 @@ bricks %s up without a cask of Amontillado
 marries %s just so it can cheat on them
 lobs bricks at %s
 nuisance-calls %s
-belms at %s
 inserts %s into a tin of shoe polish
 thinks %s's village is missing its idiot
 court-martials %s
@@ -444,3 +443,128 @@ declares %s off-topic
 throws a custard pie at %s
 fills %s's bath with ducks
 parks across %s's driveway
+replaces %s with a 1GB shell script
+waits until late Friday and then cancels %s's weekend
+perforates %s's umbrella
+flips %s the bird
+turns half of %s's USB sockets upside-down
+wishes %s's redshift were higher
+gives %s a CD of Richard Stallman's greatest hits
+gets %s to serve breakfast to Richard Stallman
+invites %s to go forth and multiply, but not in a nice way
+/ignores %s
+frustrates %s's knavish tricks
+confounds %s's politics
+indents %s
+disperses %s
+smashes %s's best china
+awards %s the wooden spoon
+pops up and insists %s accept its cookies
+glues %s to the ceiling
+refills all %s's pens with green ink
+puts %s into Room 101
+attacks %s with a pointed stick
+covers %s in gold paint
+sets TV Licensing on %s
+appends the EICAR test file to all %s's emails
+thinks %s should seek asylum in Ecuador
+thinks %s should seek an asylum in Ecuador
+thinks %s is only good enough to play for Accrington Stanley
+decommissions %s
+brings %s the head of Alfredo Garcia
+sends the Go Compare man to sing at %s
+sets a band of Russian meerkats on %s
+sends %s orienteering with only Apple Maps as a navigation aid
+blacklists %s
+remixes %s into a Youtube sensation
+throws a shoe at %s
+feeds %s to the lampreys
+feeds a surfeit of lampreys to %s
+invites %s to consider the reply given in Arkell vs Pressdram
+helps %s revoke all their biometrics
+paints %s's buttocks blue
+classifies %s as spam
+trades in %s for a younger model
+wonders if there's a cash incentive for scrapping %s
+threatens to leave the country if %s wins the next election
+invades %s's personal space
+sticks %s in a cloud
+thinks %s wouldn't need to dress up for Hallowe'en
+places mines beneath %s's carpets
+demands to see %s's birth certificate
+detunes %s
+dips %s in engine oil and throws them to the robo-lesbians
+abandons %s in the Sahara with only Mark Thatcher for company
+accuses %s of piracy, murder, rape, sodomy and incest, but suppresses the more serious charges
+cuts and pastes %s
+plays the birdie song to %s for a couple of weeks
+mutes %s
+misgenders %s
+granulates %s
+removes %s from its Christmas card list
+bulldozes %s's house
+clobbers %s
+thinks %s is only good enough to play for Accrington Stanley
+distributes poisson in %s's direction
+poisons %s
+requests that some friendly bombs fall on %s
+prunes %s
+sends all %s's packets via Royal Mail
+tortures %s then bills them for information retrieval
+quietly converts %s into a number
+thinks %s should take up Russian roulette
+removes from %s's computer all the interfaces that Apple now consider obsolete
+shrink-wraps %s
+sends %s to a shrink
+shaves %s
+volunteers %s for a position as gladiator at the Colosseum
+freezes %s in carbonite
+applies a tramp stamp to %s
+toasts %s
+proves to a UN inspector that %s is "beyond use"
+shortens all %s's URLs
+sends %s on a snipe hunt
+removes %s from its will
+puts banana in %s's shoe
+puts a scorpion in %s's shoe
+drives too fast then claims %s was driving
+threatens to make the sky fall on %s's head
+wonders how many ships %s's face would sink
+calls %s a melon-farmer
+puts a Tesco Value Burger in %s's bed
+considers %s right but repulsive
+kicks %s's ass
+reads the comments to %s
+undefines %s
+pixelates %s
+puts a tarantula in %s's bath
+invites the Blame Cube to %s's party
+dusts %s
+installs Windows Vista on %s's computer
+installs Windows ME on %s's computer
+taxes %s
+throws a triangular flapjack at %s
+burns %s's bridges
+hides %s's towel
+tells %s about Roko's Basilisk
+covers %s in bees
+sets a Mongol horde upon %s
+signs up %s for the next Christmas production in Ambridge
+gives %s a cookie
+thinks %s deserves a 21 trout salute
+pills %s
+sends %s a UKIP application form and some green ink
+berates %s for not paying road tax
+partitions %s
+proclaims "%s est omnis divisa in partes tres"
+applies a spudger to %s
+practices its McKayla Maroney impressions on %s
+declares %s to be the sort of nonsense up with which it will not put
+throws a fridge at %s
+buys a pair of glasses just so that it can glare at %s over the top of them
+strip-searches %s
+places a Pickelhaube on %s's chair
+presents %s with half a moose
+assaults %s with all of its trouts at once
+invites John Major to explain the Maastricht Treaty to %s
+pokes %s with a bayonet