X-Git-Url: http://www.chiark.greenend.org.uk/ucgi/~matthewv/git?p=irc.git;a=blobdiff_plain;f=flirts;h=d5b6432b21a85f61104db40810698f4182b62eda;hp=0b4b58d60532992c4c32e995aaeaf6c8c8eb297f;hb=edb50abc4bd5fd5b2c9dc3c4d46ad56454f9aa08;hpb=5465016f7be8d64afb29f4f5399abc52c2bab668 diff --git a/flirts b/flirts index 0b4b58d..d5b6432 100644 --- a/flirts +++ b/flirts @@ -106,3 +106,49 @@ buys a telephoto lens just to take pictures of %s offers %s some Madeira offers %s a fork gives %s a thumbs-up +goes speed-dating with a dozen clones of %s +writes a webcomic about the adventures of %s +dresses up as Batman for %s +club mammoth for %s. Ug! +sexts %s +defeats all of %s's evil exes +clones %s's repo +thinks %s is cuter than all the My Little Ponies put together +would open the pod bay doors for %s +takes upskirt photos of %s +sniffs %s's underwear +writes thousands of lines of elisp just for %s +showers %s with porcelain sunflower seeds +creates a .xxx domain just for %s +hopes rule 34 applies to %s +unzips %s +drives its tractor through %s's haystack +wonders if %s is single or transferable +doesn't want any alternatives to %s +writes 'I <3 U' in weedkiller on %s's lawn +writes about %s in popular culture +checks out %s's arse +shoots Ronald Reagan to impress %s +carves %s's name into its case +makes billions of software copies of %s to practice seducing them +fights trolls for %s +swims the Hellespont for %s +"accidentally" sends %s lewd pictures of itself using Twitter +sends %s dead plant sex organs +wears tinsel just for %s +puts on chrome makeup for %s +paints Tom Jones purple for %s +buys %s a ++Rowan Bear +imagines %s in a pair of Daisy Dukes +wonders if %s would like to meet its sister +wouldn't give a ... Castlemaine XXXX for anyone but %s +hacks into a spy satellite just to get a better look at %s +buys extra disk space just for pictures of %s +conjugates %s +offers %s a role in its new movie +resolves to grass on rejs more often (at the instigation of %s) +turns %s into a pillar of salt, and starts licking it +assists %s with onanism +gives %s a dutch rudder +posts %s a French letter +thinks %s could give their chair an orgasm