X-Git-Url: http://www.chiark.greenend.org.uk/ucgi/~matthewv/git?p=irc.git;a=blobdiff_plain;f=flirts;h=212e0b92a9ad63d85073381c9a5197db6642070d;hp=93145c243e5f7d0e266a8b3e17fb7340a480defa;hb=cb6bd27de8170bb283feafb01c23bcf9373153b0;hpb=97baa1ab156e0e8afb9f39b011a548ad13cb1f5e diff --git a/flirts b/flirts index 93145c2..212e0b9 100644 --- a/flirts +++ b/flirts @@ -4,3 +4,146 @@ offers %s a bunch of flowers blows kisses at %s falls head over heels in love with %s offers to take %s out for dinner +is %s's kind of robot +offers %s a Turkish Delight +gazes contentedly at %s +offers %s a cherry +imagines %s in a tutu +catches %s's eye across a crowded room +kisses %s's hand +wonders what a nice person like %s is doing in a place like this +licks chocolate sauce off %s +gets down on one knee in front of %s +bats its eyelashes at %s +winks suggestively at %s +blabbers incoherently at the sight of %s +mentally undresses %s +daydreams about %s +wonders what %s is really thinking +talks dirty to %s +gazes mutely into %s's eyes +wonders if %s might reciprocate its feelings +whispers sweet nothings to %s +sends %s a red rose +toasts %s with champagne +offers %s its last Rolo +invites %s up for coffee +promises %s a night to remember +invites %s in to see its etchings +wonders if %s is really that innocent +serenades %s +puts a rose between its teeth and tangoes seductively with %s +plays with its hair whilst gazing at %s +draws a magic circle around itself and %s +tickles %s playfully +draws a flattering portrait of %s +poings happily at the sight of %s +gives %s a high-five +brushes lint off %s's clothing +dims the lights for %s +invites %s behind the bike sheds +rides a tightrope on a unicycle while juggling chainsaws in an attempt to impress %s +composes haiku for %s +makes the tea for %s +strokes %s's hair +sprinkles %s with hundreds and thousands +flagellates %s with a birch branch +<3s %s +admires %s's boots +invites %s to a candle-lit dinner +pole dances for %s +hopes %s packed their toothbrush! +showers %s in rose petals +holds a candle for %s +admires %s's physique +gives %s a nice relaxing foot massage +treks through the jungle to deliver Milk Tray to %s +searches for a rhyme for its poem about %s +compares %s's eyes to stars +wonders whether %s comes here often? +compares %s to a summer's day +curls up at %s's feet +plays %s's theme tune +sends for %s and more golden syrup +puts %s on top of the Christmas tree +writes flirts just for %s +thinks %s is the new hotness +imagines %s in a sailor outfit +would like to cause earthquakes with %s +creates an "I bet we can get a million people who fancy %s" group on Facebook +becomes a fan of %s +turns down the house lights for %s +invites %s up to see its iPad +can't wait to unbox %s +dips %s in honey and throws them to the lesbians +blows %s's vuvuzela +wonders if %s is multi-touch +takes photos of %s draped over a sports car +tips its hat to %s +would Photoshop %s but they are perfect already +would betray its country for %s +creates a dozen extra Twitter accounts just to follow %s +wears sexy underwear just for %s +is never gonna give %s up +wants to FaceTime %s +spies on %s through their webcam +dyes its hair for %s +newgroups alt.fan.%s +tattoos %s's name on its bottom +makes a backup copy of %s +throws itself at %s's feet +gets its tits out for %s +buys %s a nice dress +buys %s a revealing dress +asks %s out on a date +posts pictures of %s to rule34.paheal.net [NWS!] +emails %s its favourite cat pictures +lends %s all its spoons +searches the internet for pictures of %s +writes to Dan Savage for tips on seducing %s +cross-dresses just for %s +buys a telephoto lens just to take pictures of %s +offers %s some Madeira +offers %s a fork +gives %s a thumbs-up +goes speed-dating with a dozen clones of %s +writes a webcomic about the adventures of %s +dresses up as Batman for %s +club mammoth for %s. Ug! +sexts %s +defeats all of %s's evil exes +clones %s's repo +thinks %s is cuter than all the My Little Ponies put together +would open the pod bay doors for %s +takes upskirt photos of %s +sniffs %s's underwear +writes thousands of lines of elisp just for %s +showers %s with porcelain sunflower seeds +creates a .xxx domain just for %s +hopes rule 34 applies to %s +unzips %s +drives its tractor through %s's haystack +wonders if %s is single or transferable +doesn't want any alternatives to %s +writes 'I <3 U' in weedkiller on %s's lawn +writes about %s in popular culture +checks out %s's arse +shoots Ronald Reagan to impress %s +carves %s's name into its case +makes billions of software copies of %s to practice seducing them +fights trolls for %s +swims the Hellespont for %s +"accidentally" sends %s lewd pictures of itself using Twitter +sends %s dead plant sex organs +wears tinsel just for %s +puts on chrome makeup for %s +paints Tom Jones purple for %s +buys %s a ++Rowan Bear +imagines %s in a pair of Daisy Dukes +wonders if %s would like to meet its sister +wouldn't give a ... Castlemaine XXXX for anyone but %s +hacks into a spy satellite just to get a better look at %s +buys extra disk space just for pictures of %s +conjugates %s +offers %s a role in its new movie +resolves to grass on rejs more often (at the instigation of %s)