X-Git-Url: http://www.chiark.greenend.org.uk/ucgi/~matthewv/git?p=irc.git;a=blobdiff_plain;f=flirts;h=212e0b92a9ad63d85073381c9a5197db6642070d;hp=0b938727f30c2715b8cac4b76ad5f9d86df12d1a;hb=cb6bd27de8170bb283feafb01c23bcf9373153b0;hpb=3602f1c8e08925ec3cc4979459298c1468885457

diff --git a/flirts b/flirts
index 0b93872..212e0b9 100644
--- a/flirts
+++ b/flirts
@@ -76,4 +76,74 @@ turns down the house lights for %s
 invites %s up to see its iPad
 can't wait to unbox %s
 dips %s in honey and throws them to the lesbians
-blows %s' vuvuzela
+blows %s's vuvuzela
+wonders if %s is multi-touch
+takes photos of %s draped over a sports car
+tips its hat to %s
+would Photoshop %s but they are perfect already
+would betray its country for %s
+creates a dozen extra Twitter accounts just to follow %s
+wears sexy underwear just for %s
+is never gonna give %s up
+wants to FaceTime %s
+spies on %s through their webcam
+dyes its hair for %s
+newgroups alt.fan.%s
+tattoos %s's name on its bottom
+makes a backup copy of %s
+throws itself at %s's feet
+gets its tits out for %s
+buys %s a nice dress
+buys %s a revealing dress
+asks %s out on a date
+posts pictures of %s to rule34.paheal.net [NWS!]
+emails %s its favourite cat pictures
+lends %s all its spoons
+searches the internet for pictures of %s
+writes to Dan Savage for tips on seducing %s
+cross-dresses just for %s
+buys a telephoto lens just to take pictures of %s
+offers %s some Madeira
+offers %s a fork
+gives %s a thumbs-up
+goes speed-dating with a dozen clones of %s
+writes a webcomic about the adventures of %s
+dresses up as Batman for %s
+club mammoth for %s.  Ug!
+sexts %s
+defeats all of %s's evil exes
+clones %s's repo
+thinks %s is cuter than all the My Little Ponies put together
+would open the pod bay doors for %s
+takes upskirt photos of %s
+sniffs %s's underwear
+writes thousands of lines of elisp just for %s
+showers %s with porcelain sunflower seeds
+creates a .xxx domain just for %s
+hopes rule 34 applies to %s
+unzips %s
+drives its tractor through %s's haystack
+wonders if %s is single or transferable
+doesn't want any alternatives to %s
+writes 'I <3 U' in weedkiller on %s's lawn
+writes about %s in popular culture
+checks out %s's arse
+shoots Ronald Reagan to impress %s
+carves %s's name into its case
+makes billions of software copies of %s to practice seducing them
+fights trolls for %s
+swims the Hellespont for %s
+"accidentally" sends %s lewd pictures of itself using Twitter
+sends %s dead plant sex organs
+wears tinsel just for %s
+puts on chrome makeup for %s
+paints Tom Jones purple for %s
+buys %s a ++Rowan Bear
+imagines %s in a pair of Daisy Dukes
+wonders if %s would like to meet its sister
+wouldn't give a ... Castlemaine XXXX for anyone but %s
+hacks into a spy satellite just to get a better look at %s
+buys extra disk space just for pictures of %s
+conjugates %s
+offers %s a role in its new movie
+resolves to grass on rejs more often (at the instigation of %s)