new trout from rjk

[irc.git] / flirts

diff --git a/flirts b/flirts
index 139ebd7a40c3ee555be5f3952c65c19da6c0e9e5..26cb33ec24ba5b96189e0ba5ff62e1d281223e03 100644 (file)
--- a/flirts
+++ b/flirts
@@ -95,4 +95,34 @@ throws itself at %s's feet
 gets its tits out for %s
 buys %s a nice dress
 buys %s a revealing dress
-
+asks %s out on a date
+posts pictures of %s to rule34.paheal.net [NWS!]
+emails %s its favourite cat pictures
+lends %s all its spoons
+searches the internet for pictures of %s
+writes to Dan Savage for tips on seducing %s
+cross-dresses just for %s
+buys a telephoto lens just to take pictures of %s
+offers %s some Madeira
+offers %s a fork
+gives %s a thumbs-up
+goes speed-dating with a dozen clones of %s
+writes a webcomic about the adventures of %s
+dresses up as Batman for %s
+club mammoth for %s.  Ug!
+sexts %s
+defeats all of %s's evil exes
+clones %s's repo
+thinks %s is cuter than all the My Little Ponies put together
+would open the pod bay doors for %s
+takes upskirt photos of %s
+sniffs %s's underwear
+writes thousands of lines of elisp just for %s
+showers %s with porcelain sunflower seeds
+creates a .xxx domain just for %s
+hopes rule 34 applies to %s
+unzips %s
+drives its tractor through %s's haystack
+wonders if %s is single or transferable
+doesn't want any alternatives to %s
+writes 'I <3 U' in weedkiller on %s's lawn