X-Git-Url: http://www.chiark.greenend.org.uk/ucgi/~matthewv/git?a=blobdiff_plain;f=trouts;h=de56fe1f02bff0d85ac2899f4931c15a6d6424fe;hb=cb6bd27de8170bb283feafb01c23bcf9373153b0;hp=1cfe09f2005327a136bccdb7628e8e079eaa8b24;hpb=4c96523ee6f3292b32314bb8e455c8f9db0acb18;p=irc.git

diff --git a/trouts b/trouts
index 1cfe09f..de56fe1 100644
--- a/trouts
+++ b/trouts
@@ -255,3 +255,39 @@ stamps on all %s's toys
 sends %s's phone number to twenty double glazing salespeople
 immerses %s's genitals in boiling oil
 writes 'I <3 U' in weedkiller on %s's lawn
+treats %s to 30,000 words on blancmange in popular culture
+vandalises %s's wikipedia entry
+adds #! /usr/bin/perl to the top of %s's python scripts
+pen-tests %s
+steals %s's vital bodily fluids
+hides a bomb in %s's cornflakes
+replaces %s's files with zalgo
+corrupts %s's DNA
+lies in wait for %s with a taser, some rubber tubing and a hacksaw
+shivs %s
+tells the Daily Mail all about %s
+puts a spring-loaded cactus in %s's toilet
+shops %s to the police
+varnishes %s's cake 
+malfunctions and machine-guns %s to death
+disarms %s, and then kills them anyway
+forces %s to sit through a week of compliance training
+blames %s
+challenges %s to a duel
+removes %'s atoms
+removes %'s electrons
+sends %s a SIGINT
+sends %s a SIGKILL
+rents %s's skull to a hermit crab
+unleashes 500 bears on %s
+inserts #! into %s's URL
+reimplements %s in JavaScript
+betrays %s
+disproves %s
+goes to war with %s
+declines %s
+explains the joke to %s at great length
+steals %s's name
+spatchcocks %s
+offers %s a role in its new snuff movie
+fills %s's schedule with pointless meetings