X-Git-Url: http://www.chiark.greenend.org.uk/ucgi/~matthewv/git?a=blobdiff_plain;f=trouts;h=a2c68ce245b8178a74844214608c7e57cd2a746d;hb=312441d5866a814bf1d3b8bd23d8fd6198d5bba5;hp=3e176066112c63885d479b9508ef9e4a7b305412;hpb=176c8dd52c9459aff1e85d40cdb14a8b939b6165;p=irc.git diff --git a/trouts b/trouts index 3e17606..a2c68ce 100644 --- a/trouts +++ b/trouts @@ -54,7 +54,7 @@ pulls a moonie at %s throws %s a bone invites %s to go jump throws jelly at %s -throws %s from the top of the empire state building +throws %s from the top of the Empire State Building drops a small hydrogen bomb on %s curses %s unto the seventh generation asks if %s is a man or a mouse @@ -355,7 +355,6 @@ assaults %s with Margaret Thatcher's handbag LARTs %s bustitutes %s downgrades %s's A-level results -admires %s's valves forces %s to walk the plank maroons %s on a desert island with only eight records and a useless luxury object for company creates a black hole and pushes %s beyond the event horizon @@ -363,3 +362,86 @@ shoves a giant picture of Jimmy Wales in %s's face pays The Who to follow %s around liquidizes %s's assets reduces %s to a soup-like homogenate +asks Vladimir Putin to deal with %s +thinks up Culture ship names based on %s's love life +thinks up Culture ship names based on %s's investment strategy +deconstructs %s +attributes photos of Greek antiquities to %s and informs the Hellenic Ministry of Culture +edits all %s's trouts to make them funny +steals %s's shoes +ties %s's shoelaces together +compares %s to a winter's day +forces %s to wear Princess Beatrice's hat +sticks a deckchair up %s's nose +places a PIX between %s and the rest of the world +sends a person from Porlock to disturb %s +sends an albatross to disturb %s +ebays %s, but the reserve is not met +cancels %s's show +unleashes a swarm of hungry midges upon %s +accuses %s of infringing its patents +installs a lion on %s +recites Vogon poetry to %s +suggests that %s sodomise a stegosaurus +immerses %s's internet connection in treacle +claps %s in irons +boxes %s's ears +dyes %s pink +performs a citizen's arrest upon %s +declares %s the weakest link +declares %s the missing link +swives %s and bombs the consequences +drops an F-bomb on %s +confiscates %s's property and hands it over to SOCA +sets blue meanies on %s +clamps down on %s +rot13s one of %s's files +gives %s an opportunity to test their backups +dumps a giant metal gorilla in %s's garden +sticks %s in a centrifuge +shuts %s's fingers in a door to see if it hurts +paints %s purple +scans %s and shreds the original +nails %s's head to the floor +produces an expensive Hollywood remake of %s +puts the puritans in charge of %s's party +leaves thumb tacks on %s's chair +shakes %s's booty +staples George Osborne to %s's nose +reads poetry to %s, and then throws them out of an airlock +waxes %s's bikini line +sells %s to a patent troll +autocorrects %s +executes %s in the background +makes juvenile jokes about %s's name +glues Jaffa Cakes to %s's ears +verbs some nouns just to annoy %s +appoints Tony Blair "peace envoy" to %s +resizes %s +paints %s purple and waits for the goths +plays the bagpipes at %s +bricks %s up without a cask of Amontillado +marries %s just so it can cheat on them +lobs bricks at %s +nuisance-calls %s +belms at %s +inserts %s into a tin of shoe polish +thinks %s's village is missing its idiot +court-martials %s +suggests %s stick a pair of underpants on their head and pencils up their nose +demands the source code to %s +places four beetles in $s's bed +finds %s even less amusing than "your mum" jokes +drags and drops %s +sets the vermicious knids on %s +bashes %s +bites %s's neck +puts jam in %s's printer +delivers seven thousand octopuses to %s +removes all the buttons from %s's mouse +moderates %s +declares %s off-topic +throws a custard pie at %s +fills %s's bath with ducks +parks across %s's driveway +replaces %s with a 1GB shell script